Kristin Sommers (October 2, 2002)

Last year I was so sure I had it figured out. Last October, around this time, I had gone to a huge college fair at Fair Oaks Mall. It was massive, colleges from everywhere you could think of. It was the first time I had really looked at colleges and I felt so ahead. This was, after all, only the beginning of my junior year. I had plenty of time.

Then the mail started pouring in. Colleges from Virginia, Pennsylvania, Maine, Florida, Iowa and everywhere else I could think of. Places I had never heard of and places I had never considered. It was overwhelming but I still felt OK, because they wanted me to go there. They spent money on taking beautiful pictures and putting them in a little book and sending it to me. It was only the beginning of my junior year. I was so sure I knew what I wanted to do in my life. Until I actually did it. I went to what I thought was the college of my dreams. I hated it. I followed around a woman in the profession I thought I wanted and I changed my mind. My world started to crumble. I was totally lost. It was the beginning of my junior year! I had no time! I needed a profession and a college and I needed it right now! I, unlike many of my friends, had not gone to any college visits over spring break. I felt so behind.

But I started to rebuild. My grades were better than they ever had been before and while the rest of my college-obsessed TA mates moaned about getting a B and therefore having to go to NOVA, I felt relatively calm. I had picked a new profession and some colleges to go along with it. I had good enough grades to get into them. I had gone to see my college counselor. After that visit I felt like I knew everything. I had college books! A person with college catalogs always is ahead. I knew what I wanted and where I wanted to do it. It was the end of my junior year and I felt way ahead of the rest of my friends, still trying to narrow down a list of twenty colleges to go to.

Then my senior year started. I had not gone to any college visits over the summer. I was having second thoughts about my chosen profession. The college counselor came to my English class. It was the beginning of my senior year and I had no idea what I wanted in life or where I wanted to go. And last year I had it so figured out.