By the time she had completed her freshman year at Mason, an anonymous senior had developed a severe eating disorder, was diagnosed with clinical depression, and had slowly watched all her personal relationships deteriorate- all except for one. In the fall of her freshman year, she had entered a romantic relationship, marking the beginning of a year that would leave its effects on her for a long time after it ended. 
"In the beginning, everything was fine. But over time, things progressively changed for the worse," said the anonymous Mason senior. 
The problems began when her boyfriend pressured her to become physically active. He became possessive, controlling, moody, and her feelings were no longer first priority in their relationship. When he would get angry, she would often feel the heat of his wrath, regardless of whether she had caused it or not. 
One time he came to her place of employment and screamed at her in front of her manager, fellow employees, and the rest of the people there. When he left, she pursued him to the parking lot where she tripped and cut her leg. 
He got in his car and drove away, without attempting to aid her while she lay on the ground bleeding and crying . 
"He would put me down and hurt me, but I would always return to him," she said. 
The warning signs were all there. All her friends could see the relationship was unhealthy and that it was destroying her life. He criticized her and disrespected her, but as far as she was concerned, what mattered is that he loved her. When he cheated on her three different times, she believed him when he claimed it wasn’t his fault. When he treated her harshly, she wouldn’t allow herself to dwell on it. She thought this is what she had to do. She thought she needed him. 
"At this point in the relationship, he was the only person in my life. We had lost all our friends and we were dependent on each other," she recalls. 
In the year this senior and her boyfriend dated, he never hit her, shoved her, or used force to restrain her. Nevertheless, she was in an abusive relationship. He repeatedly ridiculed her, ignored her feelings, humiliated her in public, and manipulated her with lies and contradictions; all of these are examples of behavior evident in an emotionally abusive relationship according to information packet provided by Mason’s Guidance Counselors. 
At a small school like George Mason, many students tend to believe that abuse is not a problem. People are not quick to characterize a relationship as abusive if it doesn’t involve violence and if the evidence of the abuse isn’t 
visible. However, there are actually three types of abuse in dating relationships, and although not all of them leave physical scars, all three can leave equally damaging internal wounds. 
"The three types of abuse are physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. Emotional and sexual are the most common among high school students. Ostracizing and name calling are examples of this," said George Mason Counselor Judy Becker. 
According to the packet, one out of every three high school students has been involved in an abusive relationship. However, only one out twenty-five seek help for their problems. 
"I think that most people just don’t know that they’re in an abusive relationship. I didn’t realize my boyfriend was abusive, I just took the things he did for normalcy," said another anonymous Mason senior. 
Because of the conspicuous traces that physical abuse leaves, the school packet asserts that it is not as common among high school students as the other forms of abuse; however there are certainly enough individual cases 
for it to be considered a problem. Both males and females are the perpetrators of violent acts in dating relationships, but it is the girls who are usually injured. 
Senior Erica Singleton has been a victim of all three abusive relationships, but she specifically remembers her experience with a violent boyfriend. 
"He was drinking and we began play fighting. Things went too far, he pushed me into a tree and gave me a bloody lip. My friend helped me up, but he just walked away calling me names," said Erica. 
Erica left that relationship immediately, but the school packet reports that only about four out of ten relationships end after the onset of violence and abuse. The victim’s self-esteem often plummets and he or she cannot find the 
courage to end the relationship. 
"You feel so worthless and inferior. I would think to myself, ‘Nobody else gets treated this way, something’s wrong with me,’" said Erica. 
Another common misconception pertaining to dating abuse is that the perpetrator is always a male. This is far from the truth; females have proven to be just as critical, demeaning, manipulative, and controlling. 
An anonymous Mason junior dated his girlfriend for three months during which he experienced various kinds of emotional abuse. 
"I did anything she wanted, she really had me whipped. But my affection and dedication was never returned. My friends made fun of me but I really didn’t give a [expletive]," he remarked. In the course of their three-month relationship, she cheated on him on two separate occasions. 
"I was so pissed and I even convinced myself the second time that I was going to break up with her. But once we talked about it, she somehow was able to make the situation seem petty," he said. She would eventually break up with him. 
The last type of abuse, sexual abuse, is more of an issue than students recognize. Forced sex, whether the perpetrator is a stranger or a boyfriend, is considered rape. Rape is the most extreme form of sexual abuse, but there are many more examples. Behavior that includes uncomfortable touching, demeaning remarks about one’s gender or beliefs about sex, accusatory remarks about sexual activity with others, and insisting that one dresses a certain way is behavior that constitutes abuse. 
Junior Michelle Gallimore got out of a past relationship because she felt she had been treated like an object. 
"He would force me to sit on his lap and touch me in ways that made me feel uncomfortable. My last straw was when he told all his friends that we were going to have sex and carried around a condom to show all the guys," 
remembers Michelle. 
On Sunday, January 20th, in the edition of Parade Magazine, Marilyn Stasio revealed some facts about dating abuse which examine the role of the abuser. 
For example, jealousy and uncontrollable anger are the leading causes of abuse, however, the problem roots in a more innate quality. A college professor as well as a former perpetrator of abuse, Stephen Jefferson, reflected on the issue in Stasio’s article. 
"It’s about power and control. To get a woman into a relationship, you make her think she’s the best thing in the world. But that gives her the power, and you can’t be comfortable with a woman with more power than you have. So 
you systematically break her down by isolating her from her friends, her family, her support groups," commented Jefferson. 
The abuser often justifies his actions by blaming others for his mistakes, and delegates the responsibility of his or her actions to the victim. 
"I would yell at my girlfriend occasionally and I even cheated on her several times because I didn’t think she was really into the relationship," said an anonymous Mason Freshman. 
Parade Magazine also discussed the solutions of abuse and claimed that the abuser, whether male or female, needs to work towards a solution just as the victim does, and the only solution is awareness. Whether you are an abuser or you’re being abused, being able to recognize abusive behavior and identify the effects of it in your own life as well as those around you is the first and most crucial step to attaining stability. 
The general consensus about the dangers of abusive relationships seems to be that the victim and the perpetrator fail to recognize the abusive behavior until the damages are permanent. Erica Singleton, Michelle Gallimore, and the other Mason students who shared their experiences didn’t think a romantic involvement would ever result in poor performance in school, becoming depressed, or losing trust from the people they cared about the most. 
"Abuse is not discriminatory. Your race, your gender, and even your intelligence will not determine your likeliness of being subjected to physical, emotional, or sexual abuse. The only way to prevent it is to know yourself, know your significant other, and confront the early warning signs of dating abuse before they confront you," said Erica.