Restaurant Review
Battle of the Burgers: Five Guys Goes
Up Against Elevation Burger
A Dual Review To Settle Which One Is Best

By Danny Hickle (May 26, 2006)

Over the past few months, a question has been brought up time and time again regarding two local and wonderful burger joints.  T he question is, “Which one is better?” This question alone could catalyze passionate and brutal debates, along the lines of people discussing religion.  We as Americans are that serious about our burgers.  These two burger places are Five Guys and Elevation Burger. 

Now my mind had already been made up prior to even trying Elevation Burger.  Five Guys makes the ultimate burger.  Then again I had an extreme bias due to the fact that I had never eaten an Elevation Burger.  So I decided to keep an open mind, and see if Elevation gave Five Guys a run for its money.

On Tuesday May 9, I stepped an unsure foot into the Elevation Burger, feeling as though I was betraying my beloved Five Guys.  I snapped out of this feeling of guilt as soon as the smell tickled my nostrils.  My pupils probably dilated as drool ventured down my chin to fall onto my shirt, because the smell alone was mesmerizing.  Okay, maybe it wasn’t that serious, but everyone knows that someone will be more inclined to eat at or return to eat at an establishment that smells good.  I perused the menu to see a few of the choices, and one stood out that I thought was clever.  The half-guilt Burger, which is composed of two patties, one beef, one veggie.  A healthier way to indulge, I guess, even though it’s not something I would eat, it would be appealing to all the health nuts in the city. 

I had made up my mind: “I want a double cheeseburger with bacon and ketchup.”

“I’m sorry sir, we don’t have bacon.”

“Excuse me?” I replied, somewhat hurt and offended.

“Yeah, we don’t carry bacon, because we can’t guarantee a daily freshness.”

“ Whatever, dude, I’ll live without it.”

Daily Freshness?! I’m, sorry but I can live without daily freshness.  I mean come on, you might have to put some bacon in the fridge, so what.  I don’t care if it’s greasy, or has hormones in it, or is kind of old.  It’s delicious and I have a great metabolism, and I really wanted that bacon.

Regardless of the daily freshness ordeal, they brought out my food when it was done, unlike Five Guys where usually a very shrill woman screams your number through a microphone, and gets very impatient quickly.  Elevation Burger has great customer service, along with a very cozy and welcoming environment, also opposite to the madhouse at Five Guys. 

Upon eating my food, an organic, hormone-free, pasture-raised Kobe beef with a couple of slices of cheese, I found myself rather satisfied.  It was the softest burger I have ever eaten, not as juicy as Five Guys, but juicy enough to provide me with a smile as I left.

The next day I returned to where my heart was.  The busy food court at Tysons Corner Mall, full of noise, faces and the occasional bird that snuck in through a window or door.  It took me about three minutes to order and about 15 minutes to hear that shrill woman yelling, “57!  Last call for 57!”  I opened up my foil to find the beautiful grease ball fusion of bacon, cheese and ketchup.  Hot and juicy.  Not too soft, but far from firm.  It was divine, and in a ramshackle way it was beautiful, and I knew where my heart truly was.