Commentary GM’s Hallways: ‘Like a Salmon Swimming Upstream’ By Molly Slattery (January 12, 2004)

"GO ALREADY!" I caught myself screaming at the person in front of me. Of course, they couldn’t hear me, I was shouting silently in my mind, not out loud. It would have been a waste of sound on deaf ears if I said anything anyway. As well as being deaf, they are oblivious to other people around them in their other senses too. I swear, society is going down the tubes as we know it despite all the rules we have to guide us. There is going to be a ruinous accident which will force the government to put a tighter leash on the authorities, making our lives harder than they already are. People’s performances are affected because of the traffic; someone is going to snap because they are late one too many times!

"So what? Leave earlier so you can get there on time," you say? I wish that was the answer, but we’re talking about school hallways here. Buses don’t arrive until 7:30 which only leaves 15 minutes to do what must be done. First, students must say hello to their friends they have not seen since yesterday and catch the latest gossip. There is nothing wrong with saying "hi" to your friends, but…WHY THE HECK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HALLWAY!? We have alcoves in the senior hallway, in front of the offices, benches around the display case, a place in front of the trailers, and we also have a courtyard for the seniors as well. The places I have just mentioned are more than enough to handle the large senior class’s desire to sit outside the lunchroom, so then why do they lay around on the senior hallway floor making the trip dangerous for people walking to and from the lunchroom?

Arrogance and stupidity may be the two common excuses we can ever think of, sadly. Backpacks left on the floor next to empty lunch trays make it a mine field, not to mention that long legs make excellent trip wires covering the ground forces. A student’s deadliest weapon is his/her very own backpack, even off the ground. Students aren’t aware of how powerful their backpacks are while they swing "innocently" over their shouder. Man, those things sting! The only thing beneficial about backpacks is that they supply armor protection from sneak attacks. The ones with wheels are a true threat; its handler could lose control at any minute.

Confusion of who is whose ally on the trip to the next base causes mayhem beyond imagination. Am I a left or a right? No matter which one I choose it always seems to be the wrong one. I see 10 people head down on the right, but 10 come up the right as I go down. I move left, but there is another pack of people going against me. I’m like a spawning salmon swimming upstream.

Hope to never face war? Too late, you face it on a lesser level the minute you enter the public school system’s hallways. The war we face is not a war we are aware of and that’s worse than knowing you are at war. You hurt friends more than enemies that way.

We can prevent future wars; let us sign treaties to resolve our hidden differences. Let lines tell where the forces may trek and coerce the many neutral zones so we don’t end up with a St. Valentine’s Day Massacre scene that could have been prevented.